Sunday, April 30, 2006

Guide to Online Tests

Wanna find out how intelligent you are? Or funny or mature or emotional or just how much of a dickhead you are? Relax, sit back and browse through the infinite websites out there just for you.

Here is what you need to do:

1) Create two email ids (after all you don't want to get spammed for your entire life, now do you??). The need for two ids will become evident soon.
2) Go to Google and type 'online test [insert the test type here]'.
3) Starting from the first result do right click -> open in a new window.
4) In each window follow the instructions and reach the test page.
5) Now the first time just put in all answers without any kind of effort to think. Give one of the email ids you created when asked.
6) If at the end you reach a page which ask flatteringly to pay up to get a report in your mail, just take your cursor to the top right corner and click the X button. After all you don't want to pay up for the test (in which case I would assume that you will go in for a personal visit to a specialist). On the other hand if you are ready to pay for online test please use the cursor trick I described on this page too. You see I don't want to talk to dumbos. Now getting back to the point at hand if you had to close the test window on account of their stupidity to ask for money go back to step 4.
7) Okay now you have found a website which gives the test result for free. So get serious, drink water, exercise your eyes and hands, take deep breathes and whatever. Register there with the other emailid you had created and give the test again but this time use the stuff between your ears for God's sake.
8) Liked the score. If yes stop. You don't want to spend your life giving one tests after another rather than bragging your friends/gfs/spouse etc. etc., now do you???
9) Ok ok so you did not like the score. What do those stupid pricks who created the website know about what IQ/EQ/FQ really mean; such loosers. Close the website window and go back to step 4 and hope that this time you get a really honest and correct website to give you the proper test.


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