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Metamorphosis

Tony says it beautifully here whatever I have always felt about Bombay.

Racism

We Indians have repulsing double standards on racism. When we are at the receiving ends in Europe or US we cry our voices hoarse over it. But we ourselves don't miss a chance of the sadistic pleasure of the giving end. The latest example being the treatment meted out to the African community (students as well as people on business visit) in Mumbai.

Coming from the North-East region but not being from the ethnic communities of it I have seen enough hate- how my community is snickered upon there and how those ethnic communities get unfair treatment outside of the region.

But Mumbai seemed to have a very cosmopolitan attitude when I came here an year ago. Now a cynic might say that getting the bare minimum to survive is a big struggle here and hence people do not have time for all that. But certainly I for the first time felt comfortable carrying the baggage of my origins ( being born and brought up in North-East I cannot relate to it by any of my tastes, habits or beliefs, but still you can never shake off such things). However the recent events have shaken me out and brought to reality. Looks like I didn't notice the racism here coz I was not on the receiving side ( the way I was in North-East and in the south).

Guide to Online Tests

Wanna find out how intelligent you are? Or funny or mature or emotional or just how much of a dickhead you are? Relax, sit back and browse through the infinite websites out there just for you.

Here is what you need to do:

1) Create two email ids (after all you don't want to get spammed for your entire life, now do you??). The need for two ids will become evident soon.
2) Go to Google and type 'online test [insert the test type here]'.
3) Starting from the first result do right click -> open in a new window.
4) In each window follow the instructions and reach the test page.
5) Now the first time just put in all answers without any kind of effort to think. Give one of the email ids you created when asked.
6) If at the end you reach a page which ask flatteringly to pay up to get a report in your mail, just take your cursor to the top right corner and click the X button. After all you don't want to pay up for the test (in which case I would assume that you will go in for a personal visit to a specialist). On the other hand if you are ready to pay for online test please use the cursor trick I described on this page too. You see I don't want to talk to dumbos. Now getting back to the point at hand if you had to close the test window on account of their stupidity to ask for money go back to step 4.
7) Okay now you have found a website which gives the test result for free. So get serious, drink water, exercise your eyes and hands, take deep breathes and whatever. Register there with the other emailid you had created and give the test again but this time use the stuff between your ears for God's sake.
8) Liked the score. If yes stop. You don't want to spend your life giving one tests after another rather than bragging your friends/gfs/spouse etc. etc., now do you???
9) Ok ok so you did not like the score. What do those stupid pricks who created the website know about what IQ/EQ/FQ really mean; such loosers. Close the website window and go back to step 4 and hope that this time you get a really honest and correct website to give you the proper test.

How nerd are you?

Hmmm... Took the test (Link from 22nd floor). Here's my score which is highly improbable.



Any ways that's that.
I think I will write my next post on online tests.

Farewell Waltz - Funny, Chilling, Intense

Having read 'Unbearable Lightness of Being', and 'Immortality' before, last weekend when I saw 'Farewell Waltz' in the book store I knew what I was going to read that Saturday night and Sunday.

And Milan Kundera does not disappoint. 'Farewell Waltz', 'Unbearable Lightness of Being', and 'Immortality' are all as different from each other as they can get. Still you find the same intensity, insights into human psychology said with a wrapping of sarcastic/black humor which is Milan Kundera's trademark.

The book is an account of 5 days, set in an old-fashioned Central European spa town, in the life of a trumpeter who has just received a call from a nurse in the spa about her being pregnant from one brief encounter they had some time ago.

One thing I found it had in common with 'Immortality' is the existence of a character doing a crazy thing with utter conviction and 'justification' (read both to see what I mean and I can promise none of the two will be a let down). What they were doing and the reason behind are totally different but still it gives a sense of deja vu. I am not complaining though.

I am told that 'Life is Elsewhere' is not all that fulfilling by one of my fellow Kundera fan. But I am sure gonna read it. Anything by Kundera deserves to be read.

Local Trains and Utopian Ideas

Read the below news on Sunday Times of India front page:

"Mumbai locals may be air-conditioned

Tired of sweating it out in local trains? Some ‘cool’ news may be on the anvil as Union railway minister Lalu Prasad is considering the Maharashtra government’s proposal to run air-conditioned trains on the Mumbai suburban network. The state government has been clamouring for the introduction of AC coaches in local trains to attract the huge pool of car owners currently clogging the roads of Mumbai. With more than 15 lakh vehicles on Mumbai’s roads on any given day, the government hopes that the prospect of a comfortable journey by AC coaches will induce car owners to take trains. Against this backdrop, chief minister Vilasrao Deshmukh had written to Lalu in January. While cleaning up station areas and expediting pending railway works were also part of the letter, the thrust was on the introduction of AC coaches in the existing trains, followed by all-AC trains. TNN"

AC trains are always cool (pun intended); but the government's hope of inducing car owners to take trains is going to crash. Here is why:

1) Where is the space? Take a look at any local train. Does it look anyway that more people can board it in a civilized manner? Getting into one requires head strongness and the absence of guilt in stamping feets. Does the government think that people who can afford cars would care to bother with trains in such a situation? I don't own a bike let alone a car and still I try to take an auto or a bus(comparatively comfortable) to wherever possible.

2) Where does a passenger spend a large amount of his time of journey? Before you shout train, let me put down a couple of other places which the passenger will visit:
a) Auto/Taxi to get to and from the station. Well the government isn't certainly hoping that people have their source and destination just beside the station.
b) Platforms/Ticket Counters.
Now any Mumbai guy will know none of the above are air conditioned and the crowds at platform is nothing less then what you will meet in your coach. So no sane car owner, I repeat no sane car owner is going to travel by a train be it AC or non AC.

Now if only the government wakes up from its slumber and start thinking about real solutions instead of crazy ideas.